First, Madison, my 13 year old, and I are delivering her flyers. We do it together every week-end. She makes a little money and we get to spend some time together. Our conversation drifted to clothing, specifically girl's clothing. Not my favorite subject, but as the father of four daughters in a sex obsessed culture, one that I have some definite opinions about. Suffice it to say my opinion's differ from Maddie's. But she still surrenders to my leadership in this area and is always curious about why I think what I do. In her own words, "Dad, I'd never wear anything too revealing, that's icky. But you are a bit to strict on these kinds of things." I respond by reminding her that I am a bit more qualified to understand the thoughts and intentions of a teen-age boy than she is. She says she thinks I am over-reacting. "Sure some boys are gross," she agrees, "but most are not." I agree that most are not, but that she is far from the expert of the mental patterns of the average teen-age boy. She smiles and says she disagrees.
Fast forward to just before bed last night. I'm digging into a new book I got from the library, War is a Force that Gives Us Meaning, by Chris Hedges. It's already a fascinating book and one that I would recommend just after reading the introduction and table of contents. One of the ideas in the book is that war has an addictive aspect to it. It's something that we turn to when we feel something is lacking in our lives. It makes reality a bit clearer when we can delineate clearly the good guys and the bad guys. Too bad that the line between those two is never as clear as it appears to be. Far from rejecting the need for war, Hedges simply says that we must be aware that it has deeper powers over the human heart than we can imagine. And those who choose to go to war must do it with a greater understand of our own weaknesses when it comes to this force. In short, we don't know as much about it as we think we know.
And so I started to wonder...
Madison thinks she is an expert on what boys think. Despite the damage it may do to her self-esteem I have the need to tell her she's wrong. But there are so many times that I am in the same boat. I am the spiritual teen-ager telling God, "I get this, I know what I am doing." I know what is best for me. And He looks at the situation and says, "There is more going on here than you realize. You'll have to defer to my leadership in this area or it's going to come back and bite you."
Humanity suffers from an overestimation of our own ability to discern reality. Far too often we think we understand. I see it constantly in the church (not to mention in my own heart) where we refuse to let our overly simplistic understandings of what God is up to in the world (what He wants to do and HOW He wants to do it) face the deep scrutiny of reality. We need a healthy dose of "I don't really get it...now what?" if we are to keep growing and learning about God and His world.
Madison needs to dethrone herself when it comes to her expert status on understanding the male species. Humanity needs to rethink the deeper reasons and implications that come from war. And me, I need to admit that in reality I am a spiritual teen-ager who thinks I know a lot more than I really do.
Humility is often in short supply.
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1 comment:
an excellent post Jeff. Lots to think about.
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